Showing posts with label safety. Show all posts
Showing posts with label safety. Show all posts

Monday, June 27, 2016

Van der Kolk on feeling safe and treating trauma.

Being able to feel safe with other people is probably the single most important aspect of mental health; safe connections are fundamental to meaningful and satisfying lives. 
– Van der Kolk
There's an interview with Bessel van der Kolk here. Van der Kolk is a Dutch psychiatrist noted for his research in the area of post-traumatic stress since the 1970s. He's also introduced as the medical director and founder of the Trauma Center at Justice Resource Institute and professor of psychiatry at the Boston University School of Medicine in an interview with psychotherapy dot net.

He talks about his work, and how his research posits that talk-therapy alone cannot treat trauma.
Of course, talking can be very helpful in acknowledging the reality about what’s happened and how it’s affected you, but talking about it doesn’t put it behind you because it doesn’t go deep enough into the survival brain.
He goes on ...
But there is a mistaken notion that trauma is primarily about memory—the story of what has happened; and that is probably often true for the first few days after the traumatic event, but then a cascade of defences precipitate a variety of reactions in mind and brain that are attempts to blunt the impact of the ongoing sense of threat, but which tend to set up their own plethora of problems. So, trying to find a chemical to abolish bad memories is an interesting academic enterprise, but it’s unlikely to help many patients. It’s a too-simplistic view in my opinion. Your whole mind, brain and sense of self is changed in response to trauma.
In the long term the largest problem of being traumatised is that it’s hard to feel that anything that’s going on around you really matters. It is difficult to love and take care of people and get involved in pleasure and engagements because your brain has been re-organised to deal with danger.
It is only partly an issue of consciousness. Much has to do with unconscious parts of the brain that keep interpreting the world as being dangerous and frightening and feeling helpless. You know you shouldn’t feel that way, but you do, and that makes you feel defective and ashamed.
Instead, Van der Kolk discusses other helpful methods to incorporate, including EMDR and body awareness (he uses Yoga in a lot of his work, and claims in 8-week yoga trials people felt significantly better):
Traumatised people often become insensible to themselves. They find it difficult to sense pleasure and to feel engaged. These understandings force us to use methods to awaken the sensory modalities in the person.
When asked about what research he's found promising lately, he highlights a few new areas of research:
Learning how to interpret quantitative EEGs allowed me to actually visualise what parts of the brain are distorted by traumatic experiences, and this can help us target specific brain areas where there is abnormal activity and where the problem actually is.

In another example, the frontal lobes of traumatised people often have activity similar to that of kids with ADHD, which makes it difficult to attend with the subtlety that we need to lead nuanced lives.
There is still so much work to be done regarding new treatments. Treatment is still being tested and quantified. There are different camps touting their own methods, and accessing any of it isn't always possible. I find it promising, and that's not nothing.

* The Establishment also has several articles on trauma and PTSD that were published today. *

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Jason Bourne / frantic running.

Why do I get visions of Jason Bourne running frantically past me, away from my life?

These last few days, I've felt a base-line of anxiety in my chest. It’s bearable, but it’s omnipresent. It’s a new type of being on edge. Something I'm not familiar with.

Yesterday was worse. I was perpetually fighting the desire to abandon my life. I had trouble concentrating, trouble really hearing people. I wanted to be left alone. I wanted no human contact. And what I could sense, was fear because I was acutely aware of how “not normal” I was feeling.

I could be fired for this anti-social behaviour.

If I were required to do something, would I be able to?

How can I nod my head and engage when I'm vacant and incapacitated?

Do I look as detached as I feel?

Fuck, I don’t give a shit Linda.


In the past I’ve described my panic attacks as being rooted in the fight or flight part of survival. This panicked, urgent burst of adrenaline that propels you forward zigging and zagging your way to a safer space. But instead of facing something life threatening, you’re at a social event or thinking about things you need to do. A panic attack is like nothing I’d ever experienced before. But that’s not what this is.

Well, this is rooted in the same survival instinct. I get this palpitation in the front of my chest that’s followed by visions of just running. Just getting the fuck out of here and finding safety in the distance between me and my life.

Obviously this isn't a truth. It’s not about physically leaving the people and places I know, especially since I’d have no way to support myself. What it does seem to be about is that initial feeling.

It’s this desire to escape. My visions are of running, of a Jason Bourne-like energy. Killing a guy with a bic pen. Parkouring my way away from a life that holds so little of me. It’s the moment you cut yourself free and can sprint for the tree line. It’s running towards safety. Maybe that’s what the craving is for, the sensation of an initial wave of freedom, followed by a impassioned, frantic race to safety. It’s knowing safety exists, and that you can get there.

That’s all I want these days. Safety. A quiet comfort. Everything I can use to comfort myself is bad for me. Food. Alcohol. Drugs. What else is there? Sex only works if you don’t hate your fucking body. Spirituality and religion only works if you’re a believer. Exercise only works when you’re at the plateau point and not hating every moment of the initial uphill battle. My comforts are small and sometimes my only solace is unconsciousness. So yes, a promise of safety sounds god-damn delightful. So does another Jason Bourne film.