Wednesday, February 25, 2015

I'm having a bad day Temple Grandin.

Today I don’t feel too great. I’m tired. I know the eternal winter that is 2015’s snow-dump doesn’t help. Seasonal Affective Disorder - or S.A.D - because why the fuck not.

Monday I found out that I’ll soon need a root canal. So there’s a few grand in medical expenses I wasn’t expecting. Hopefully my work insurance will cover most of it.

It’s odd though. The hygienist put this weighted protective vest on me in order to take x-rays, and I really liked it. I thought it was calming, and when she removed it I was tempted to ask her to leave it on me.

This made me think of Temple Grandin and how folks on the autism spectrum often like weighted blankets or feeling compressed. I think I’m going to look into this. Sometimes when I get overwhelmed I like lying on my stomach/on my face.

I’m going to look into possible getting a weighted blanket - or maybe there are at-home DIY versions that can help in self-soothing. An idea! Huzzah!

Onward!

So I can potentially access sliding-scale services through The Argyle again (between 40 and 60$), or through The Montreal Therapy Centre, which charges 80$ a session.

Still nothing regarding a psychiatrist.

This is what’s been made available to me so far. I saw Dr. Rishi yesterday and he mentioned contacting Dr. Singh from St-Mary’s to see if there was anything else I could access, but I take the silence to mean that there isn't.

So I have to figure out what I want. What’s next? From this vantage point it seems like The Argyle is where I’ll start. I'm not pumped about the commute, or the cost - but maybe I could go once or twice a month in hopes of it helping.

Part of my wonders if it’s really worth it. What am I trying to discover? There is no root, it’s just sadness. It’s just constant.

Not feeling great today, going to go home and sleep on my face.

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